Superior Blogs

       The first blog that I feel is the most interesting is Country Girl.  The blogs are very personal and relate to her everyday life.  I get a hint of her personality, humor, and view on life with every blog posted.  They are also well written discussing relevant and different topics that I would have never thought about.

            I feel this blog could help me to become a better blogger by adding some of my personal life and past experiences into them to make it more interesting.

            I also like to view Laur’sBLOG because the blogs are short and sweet.  They may not be the most interesting, but they get right to the point and I agree with many of the things discussed in the blogs.

            What I can learn from this particular blog is that short is not always bad.  I tend to go into detail and often get off topic.  By keeping it short it allows me to get to the point and say what I initially wanted the blog to be about.

            Although the name of the blog, UB online class, is not the most interesting this student has some pretty original and interesting titles to the blogs posted.  It catches the eye of the reader and makes them want to read the blog.  Most of the posts are just as intriguing and entertaining as the titles themselves.

            I feel that I have pretty good titles, but I bet I could be a little more clever and thoughtful putting more energy into the blog rather than just picking a title that relates to it.

The Theory and Practice of What?

         I do not believe there are different degrees or forms or rape.  Rape is when a man forces sexual intercourse on to a woman, or vice versa, without verbal consent of the woman.  The key word here is force.  Like so many people my age say, “you can’t rape the willing,” rape is only valid when one of the partners during intercourse does not want it to happen.  I became nauseated reading chapter eight, by Morgan, about pornography as the theory and rape as the practice.  How long can one go on about our society as male dominated and that rape is almost an epidemic.  I agree that rape is a serious issue and that it should never be tolerated, but I do not think that pornography is directly connected nor do I see a clear connection in the reading.  Also, I feel that rape is a clear term with no grey areas in between and that excuses should not be made for why it happens.

            I will admit that I am not the best at reading in between the lines for I do not understand why pornography is the theory and rape is the practice.  If I tried hard enough I bet I could make something up that would sound relative to me, but there was little said about pornography in the reading.  It just went on in detail about our patriarchal society and that rape is all about man perfecting their sexuality.  Give me a break!  This is obviously a propaganda article written by an almost radical feminist.  How ever Morgan is trying to relate pornography to rape is unclear to me, but in my perspective I feel that there is some relation between the two, but it does not really affect the prevalence of rape. 

I stated in a past blog that watching porn is sometimes like a gateway drug.  Some people with certain personalities and thresholds use regular porn as a gateway to other types of more raunchy and hardcore porn even developing an interest to child pornography.  This is the one instance where I feel pornography can lead to rape.  If a man is constantly watching pornography where there are scenes of a man or men raping a woman, then eventually maybe that man would feel, in his mind, that it is alright to rape a woman or that since he has been watching rape so often, that he has the urge to rape himself.  Pornography can do this to some men, but I do not believe it happens to every person.  Pornography can simply be a way for men to release some sexual tension, while others become addicted to it.  It all depends on the individual for we all react differently to it.  In all other instances I do not believe that pornography is related to rape.  Yes, there may be tons of sex movies that involve rape, but that does not necessarily mean that it is portraying our society or that the viewer will be more inclined to rape.  Not everybody goes with the saying, “monkey see, monkey do.”  Although rape in pornography is degrading it is a way of expression and it does turn on different individuals.

            The other issue I wanted to attack is the examples of rape.  In the reading Morgan discusses that sometimes society gives excuses for why rape occurs such as when a woman dresses scantily and draws the rapist to them and then tries to deny the sex.  All these different scenarios mean nothing to me.  Rape is when there is no verbal consent between the two engaging in sex and the sex itself is forced upon the victim with no relevance prior to the bedroom.  No matter what the situation may be that is when rape occurs.  I do not care if the woman is leading on the man for days and then decides she does not want to have sex, it is still rape and the woman should not be blamed.  Granted the way she dressed or acted led the man on to believe that sex was in their future if the woman decided at the last second she did not want sex, then that is her decision.  I do not like when people make excuses that our society and the media give excuses for rape.  Let people dress and act whatever way they want.  Who cares if it encourages sexual activity.  Every person should know when the line should be drawn about rape.  No consent, no sex.  Lead me on all you want with your miniskirt and low cut shirt. If you tell me you do not want to have sex, then I guess I will be sleeping alone tonight.

These Arn’t Myths…They’re Facts!

  After viewing the entertaining link to the Porn Myths I decided that I was Pro, which concluded that I would have to write a blog from the opposite point of view.  On the site there are eight different myths, which I supposedly do not think are myths.  I will focus on two of them. 

The first myth that is obviously factual is myth number six stating that women in the porn industry are empowered because they get to call all the shots.  This is obviously not a myth with evidence from the lectures and readings.  In straight pornography women are paid at least triple of what male actors are paid.  They are able to tell their male co-workers what they can and cannot do during a sex scene and most of the time are able to choose who they work with.  If you think about men are the major consumers of this industry and want to see a naked woman having sex and being pleasured.  Without that variable there would be little or no audience so the female actor is a very crucial and important part of this industry.  The actress will put on a better performance if she feels more comfortable during a sex scene and if that means that the male cannot stick his fingers up her butt, then there will be no fingers up her butt. 

Of course this leads on women to believe they are empowered because they finally get a say in the workplace.  Even after the suffrage of women and equality laws men always have the upper hand in many industries and workplaces.  The adult film industry is all about the female and her wants and needs.  The female actors are catered to and chosen before any male is even thought about.  For these obvious reasons myth six is definitely a fact.

The second myth that is factual would by myth four that states, “Men like a variety in women so porn use helps a man stay faithful to his woman.”  Nine out of ten times a man is going to think with his penis before he thinks with his brain.  This is simply human nature.  If there was no porn a man may not necessarily become unfaithful to his woman, but could definitely become uninterested and the sex like could become dull.  Porn is a way to let a man fulfill his fantasies.  Maybe some men like women of all races and colors.  The use of porn helps that man become satisfied with other types of women and allows him to still sleep with the same person.  By fantasizing about another woman and getting off about thinking about that other woman replaces the man from wondering off to physically have sex with his “fantasy girl.”  Since the porn is fulfilling his fantasy he has no need to become unfaithful for he has been satisfied and will still remain content with his girlfriend/wife.  Pornography can also give a man different ideas of livening up his sex life.  He could take the ideas and actions he views from the movie with his “fantasy girl” in it and relay it to the bedroom with his significant other.  By letting a man explore his sexual fantasies online or at home with a video it allows him to remain faithful for he does not feel confined and strapped to the same woman or fantasy.

Save the Children From What?

         I honestly do not see the big deal with sex education in school and the emphasis about talking to your children about safe sex and sex in general.  Children are so advanced for their age nowadays that by the time parents even think about having the “talk” the children know far more than their parents could believe.  After reading a blog post discussing the preventing of children or early teens viewing porn and that it is basically inevitable.  The post goes on to say that different television shows bring up different life situations that deal with sex and that it is basically never to early to start talking about sex.

            I agree with the fact that one should start talking about sex at an early age, but not because we should be paranoid parents about AIDS and unprotected sex, but to be comfortable talking about it.  My parents really never talked that much about sex to my brother and me when we were young and we never had the “talk.”  When my parents ask me about having sex and anything involved with sex I get extremely uncomfortable and embarrassed because that is one thing I definitely do not want to discuss with them.  I could go on for days about sex with my friends, but with my parents it is like a nightmare!  I believe that if my parents talked about sex from when I was young as if it was something normal and not so secretive and adult-like, then I would be comfortable confiding in my parents about my sex life or anything dealing with that topic.  If parents want to communicate with their children about sex and have them listen and not feel embarrassed, then they should get used to the conversation about sex at an early age.  I probably would have been less paranoid and worried about certain situations dealing with sex if I could have discussed it with my parents who have experience, but since I could not fathom the idea of having such an awkward conversation I had to resort to friends who were on the same boat as me.

             The other issue that I wanted to discuss is that this society feels that porn is becoming an epidemic, especially when it comes to young adults.  We feel that if porn is not tolerated and controlled that we are going to start viewing it younger and younger as time progresses.  Say what you want, but every person is going to view porn sometime in their life.  Those that view it earlier are usually more daring and know what it is all about before they even see it and if they don’t, then they will soon find out.  Porn and sex is apart of life so I do not see the big deal here.  I bet over half the kids my age learned about sex from their friends, movies, television, and the internet and not through their parents.  I do not know who still has the “talk” or anyone who has learned anything valuable from sex education.  With the way our society is working with all the sources online and through the media it is easy to learn about STDs and everything involved with sex.  I feel that we should not be saving our children from viewing porn for the only real way a child is going to view it is if they have access to it.  If their parents are going to be lazy enough to give their children a chance to view porn, then it is their fault.  There are tons of different ways to prevent children from adult material such as parental controls on the computer as well as the V-chip.  Children act a lot older than they did 20 years ago and a little sexual content never hurt anyone.  If your going to be that controlling, then you better not let your kid watch any commercials because if you didn’t know; sex sells.

Desensitize

              Today I am actually going to take a standpoint about porn that is against it.  I thought I would switch it up a bit, but of course I will give a little of my insight on both sides of the story.  This week’s topics in the lecture dealing with the consequences of porn and the relationship of pornography and rape I found to be very interesting.  With all the studies stated in lecture 20 discussing that those who watch violent porn are more prone to become more violent towards women and perform rape was something that I actually agreed with to a certain degree.

            I know I have said in the past that pornography is merely as social stigma and that it is harmless, but I feel that porn can definitely desensitize a person.  If I am watching pornography three or four times a week and that majority of what I watch deals with raping a women or violence towards a women, eventually I will feel that rape is not as bad as society thinks.  This is like any other scenario.  Those who are not drug users feel it is extremely harmful to the body, against the law, and unattractive.  I bet if I started using drugs my mind would change very quickly.  This is most likely a result of being desensitized to the harmful affects of drugs for I would be an avid user.  If I am constantly viewing pornography with rape, then rape itself is not going to seem so harmful anymore.  To some degree I feel that the more one watches porn with scenes of rape the more likely they will commit a sex crime, but I feel it is in one’s genetic makeup or childhood experience that triggers this action.  If one was raped as a child they are definitely more prone to being a sex offender and pornography may influence this.  What I do not agree with is that a person who has had no sexual abuse or repression as a child is more likely to commit rape by watching porn.  Although pornography can brainwash someone I feel it is less possible for those people to be a sex offender.

            Maybe it has to do with one’s mindset and personality.  If one is easily persuaded or thought to be more of a follower than a leader as well as a loner or antisocial, then they will probably be more influenced by pornography.  Those who have more willpower and are not gullible or easily persuaded will not watch violent porn and become violent towards women.  I know I am being extremely contradictory for it seems like I do not know which side I am on right now, but while I am typing this blog it is becoming harder and harder to decide what is right.

            Overall I feel that porn can lead to rape only by those who are persuaded easily even though it can happen to anybody and has been shown to happen to people who never would have thought of it.  I read in the news not too long ago that a man was caught watching child porn.  He confessed the crime and said he never thought in a million years that he would be watching porn, but by watching regular porn it was a gateway to more intense porn that eventually led to child porn.  This goes the same for rape and pornography.  The more you watch it the more you become desensitized and desensitization is the one thing that I feel is the result of committing sex crimes and violence towards women.

+ & – Sexual Arousal

           Every person has their own unique genetic makeup, which results in different personalities and fingerprints as well as what gets them sexually aroused.  After reading chapter seven in the text dealing with the, “Social Psychological Perspective on Internet Sexuality,” I came to the conclusion that one becomes sexually aroused by different images, acts, or scenarios by their own personal liking and not by the influence of the internet.  I feel that the internet merely enhances the sexual arousal of an individual for it gives them an outlet to relieve their sexual stress and gives them a location to view their fantasies.  I do not feel that the internet determines how an individual becomes sexually aroused.  Although this is not what the reading was specifically about I felt this should be addressed.

       Honestly, I did not understand much of the reading for it sounded like some kind of complicated psychological analysis of a mentally disturbed patient.  What I got from the reading was that those who respond to sexually explicit material positively will have a better sexual relationship with their partner and have a better understanding to the explicit material on the internet. 

            The entire social psychological perspective and the “sexual behavior sequence” were very confusing and complex.  It did not quite make sense to me, but I feel it could have definitely been simplified.  What I took from it was that if an individual approaches sexually explicit material in a positive way and is comfortable viewing it, then that individual will have more self control and be able to regulate the sexually explicit material they view.  Those who are uncomfortable with their sexuality and those who respond to sexuality weakly may not have as much control over the pornography they view and it could have a negative affect on how they view pornography putting a strain on their sexual relationship with their partner.  For example, the reading discussed a scenario where an individual was aroused by ejaculating on different parts of the body.  The individual who has strong sexual arousal responses would approach this situation by asking their partner to engage in this sexual act in a very explanatory way.  If their partner disagreed then that individual may find an alternative way to make that sexually aroused scenario become reality with their partner still feeling comfortable.  If that individual had weaker arousal responses to sexuality, they may be stubborn and try to force this scenario on their partner resulting in something negative.

            What I personally feel this reading was saying is that different people have different tolerances for being sexually aroused and handle it in different ways in different degrees.  Basically those who handle sexually arousal well will have more self control and will incorporate what arouses them with their partner in a way that both are satisfied and comfortable.  Those who have a weaker sexually arousal “trait” will not be able to assess and handle the situation as well for that is not one of their strong points just like mathematics was a weak subject for the individual in high school.  Every person handles things in life differently.  Anything to do with sexuality can be a breeze for one individual, while it is even difficult to discuss with another.  Going back to the beginning of this blog I feel that after being exposed to the internet that one will favor something that personally arouses them with no direct influence of the internet.  They may view something on the internet for the first time and take an interest in it, but it is not the internet that chooses their fetishes or likings.  The internet is merely a tool to find out how one can become sexually aroused for it enables an individual to explore the entire world of sex and sexual arousal.  It is ultimately what the individual is fond of.  It is comparable to a male preferring blondes over brunettes.  A male may prefer hardcore pornography on the internet over soft-core porn.  It is their personal preference that choice this for them for the internet just provides them an outlet to view what makes them aroused.

Cigarettes Vs Porn

         Is an addiction to pornography relative to an addiction to cigarettes?  In response to a fellow student’s blog dealing with the differences of cigarettes and porn I feel that they are different because their addiction involves different things.  Both cigarettes and porn are not only physically addictive, but psychological.  People who are addicted to porn love the aroused feeling they get, while those who are chain smokers feel at ease with a cigarette in their mouth.  They are also both psychologically addictive because not everyone can become addicted to porn.  There has to be some switch that clicks on in someone’s head when porn is viewed that it is the most incredible and desirable thing on earth.  They become obsessed and feel it is necessary to watch and to be able to function with their everyday lives.  Those who are addicted to cigarettes start to feel anxious and annoyed when cigarettes are not present for an extended amount of time.  They might even have some physical symptoms such as shaking.  This is all due to the mind.  One thinks they need to have a cigarette or it will affect their concentration or body, but it’s all due to the addiction.

            Now that we have covered how they are the same, they are both totally different for they both incur different social stigmas.  Cigarettes are something common that most people do not hide underneath the mattress.  People smoke in public and are not ashamed of it.  Most people think it is cool.  Watch any movie and I bet you cannot find a movie that has not one cigarette lit in it.  Cigarettes are all around us so there is no shame in them.  Although they affect out health and the health of others since there is no degradation of females through sex and there is no sex involved it seems to be somewhat moral with our society.

            Porn on the other hand is something that the majority hides from the public.  I doubt anyone would admit that they have an addiction to sex or porn.  There is sex in movies, but not every movie has explicit, raw, and hardcore sex scenes.  It is just not a commonplace in our society.  Yes porn and sex are all around us, but not on full display in magazines or the media such as cigarettes.  Again, the reason why an addiction to porn is so severe is not only because it involves hardcore pornography, but because you cannot show this to children.  Any person can smoke in front of a child and not have a second thought to it.  The only warning to them is not to smoke when the children get older.  Since cigarettes are more publicly displayed than porn this is the reason why porn has a larger social stigma.

            I feel that an addiction to cigarettes is far worse than an addiction to pornography.  Pornography does not really affect the health of yourself or anyone else, unless one takes it to an extreme where their entire life revolves around porn and one stops taking care of their body.  Cigarettes are basically death sticks.  Any person can die from smoking them and is just as harmful as some illegal drugs that are addictive.  Pornography could just be viewed as a hobby or pastime, but since it involves almost total strangers engaging in raunchy sex it is not okay with our society.  Also, if porn was discussed more  publicly I think that the stigma would decrease a few degrees.  There will always be a stigma on it for what it involves, but if we were constantly reminded of it in the media it would not come as a total shocker to us.

Remembering Sex

         Does sex really sell when it comes to advertisements?  In some cases it does while in others it may seem not to.  After watching lecture 17 I was unsure if ads containing sexual content really sold more of the product being advertised.  It was said that some viewers tend to forget the brands that have high sexual content in their advertisements, but I would feel that it is the opposite.  If I saw something very risqué I would not forget that ad and probably tell one of my friends about it.

            Also, after watching the lecture I searched google for an article concerning sex in ads.  I did not come across one right away, but I did find an article that still proves my point.  There was a study done at Iowa State University where about 300 people between 18-54 were studied.  They watched three types of television programs.  One which was violent, another that was sexually explicit, and the last was a neutral television program.  After viewing the programs the volunteers were asked to answer questions about the commercials and then 24 hours later were called and asked similar questions about them.  When later asked questions about the commercials, during the neutral television program, many of the volunteers’ memory was very good, while this was the opposite for the violent and sexual programs.  It was concluded that sex and violence in television programs could impair one’s memory for television ads.

            The reasons why one’s memory would be impaired is the fact that one is so engaged in the sex and violence that it is often what they are thinking about during the commercials and fail to pay attention to the program breaks.  One could be discussing with a friend what was happening in the last scene or sexual or violent thoughts could be flowing through one’s mind during the commercial break.  I know personally that when I watch something that I enjoy or that is arousing I often think about it or something similar to it that relates to my life during the commercials.  Another reason could be one’s attention span.  We all know that college student’s attention span is very small so if one is paying very close attention to a television show that deals with something so intense as sex or violence, then they may not be so attentive during the commercials; often giving their minds a break.

            Although we are discussing sexually explicit television shows and not television ads I still feel this is relevant and relative.  Since the shows were dealing with sex the viewers were drawn into the program and even were thinking about it afterwards.  This is the same for ads.  If sex is involved in the media one will remember that image as well as the image of the brand being advertised.  Products that put sex in their ads may or may not sell more products than those that do not use sex, but those brands that do definitely remain in one’s mind after that commercial has aired.

Eccentric Plots & Paperwork

      I never knew how intricate the porn industry could be until I read chapter six, Not the Wild West: Porn in the USA.  From how women are dominant over men in the business to the different aspects of being an adult actor to the legal issues revolving around the industry are complex and above all very interesting and not what I expected.  The two things that caught my eye the most were the storylines of a pornography film as well as the legal issues.

            I know that film is a form of art and art is supposed to be creative and expressionistic, but some of the plots of these pornographies are just ridiculous.  For example, the text discusses the film AD 6969, which has a futuristic style.  A film based on the future is great, but some of the details shared in the text are absurd.  The one character is a cyborg and in order for him to be brought to live a “sex chip” must be interested into him or it.  Just this minute detail of the film displays that the creator was either under the influence of some drug or just thought he was being really creative and clever.  I know that plain, old sex gets boring to watch after a while (I guess), and there often needs to be a change of pace to spice things up, but these storylines are moronic.  Do you really want to watch a woman have sex with a cyborg whom she had to bring to life herself?  I asked myself why pornographies cannot just be like an ordinary movie with a useful storyline, good actors, and some decent clothes, but then I read further into the chapter.  What I did not realize, which is blatantly obvious, is that people watch porn to watch people have sex and could care less about the plot.  Although it gives it a little more to the imagination the plot is not what porn lovers are looking for.  So basically if there is sex in a movie it really doesn’t matter if the characters are aliens, robots, or spirits as long as they resemble good-looking people having sex. That’s all that really counts.

            Another aspect of pornography that is appealing is its legalities.  After the Child Protection and Obscenity Enforcement Act was established in 1995 all pornographic film companies has to go through extensive paper work for the actors they hired.  Whether they were 18 or 45 they needed to provide evidence of identification and more importantly that they were of age.  Every time a film was created and a new actor was brought in tons of paper work needed to be filled out to make sure these actors were of age.  This still goes on today and the pornographic film companies feel this is a hassle.  I think these people have no room to complain.  Look at all the hassle bars and restaurants go through to sell liquor in their businesses and the repercussions of an underage drinker being caught with an alcoholic beverage.  I feel they should just fill out the paper work and he happy knowing that their butts are covered from lawsuits and fines.  This ensures that there are no underage actors for that film would be considered child pornography and not only will the film company be liable for prosecution, but so will everyone who purchases the film. 

            When most people think of the porn industry they merely think of sex and drugs, and the words dirty, whore, and pervert come to mind.  One would never think that paperwork, laws, and contracts were really involved in this industry.  It is like any other business that has structure and organization to keep it going.  Why do you think it makes billions of dollars annually? 

Who needs condoms?

            I attended a catholic school for nine years and although it was not during the raging hormone years of high school they still had plenty to say about sex.  I do not feel that sex should be discussed throughout the school, but in a certain class that deals with sex.  In religion class we did not discuss that the bible says that sex is only permissible when procreating.  Sex was saved for health class where safe sex was stressed and taught.  Although this is a totally different atmosphere than a college I feel that this blog post is somewhat misleading. 

            UB does offer some classes dealing with sex and sexuality and free condoms are frequently distributed.  (I even saw “free condoms” on a poster as an incentive to attend a club’s meeting)  Just because D’Youville is not passing out condoms like it is candy or offering such classes does not mean that their students are not well informed.  First of all it is a pre-conceived notion that since D’Youville is a private school that sex should only happen in a marriage.  This may be the regulations for the religious aspect, but not everyone that goes to this school is catholic or will follow those guidelines nor does the school think they will.  I am sure there are pamphlets or workshops about sexuality or safe sex.  Let’s be real here.  This is college we are talking about; sex is on a students top ten list.  Also, how many commercials, health classes in high school, or lectures from our parents do we need to understand that safe sex is the way to go?  If someone chooses to have sex without a condom, then that is their problem.  Don’t tell me that they never heard of safe sex before and just because condoms aren’t randomly thrown at you in your Student Union does not mean one cannot go out and purchase them.  If they happen to not have them and still decide to have sex, then one needs more willpower. 

            If anything UB is promoting sex.  Whether it is promiscuous sex, safe sex, or any kind of sex passing out condoms or letting coeds sleep in the same dorm room is promoting sex.  I do not feel that there is anything wrong with this, but just because condoms are being passed out and there are classes that talk about sex does not mean these students will practice safe sex more often than those at a private school where it is a total different atmosphere.

            Sex can be something so sporadic that the safest person could end up having unsafe sex.  Free condoms or no free condoms you are the one that influences your actions.